The more I think about music in general the more I want to get into it as a career. I mean, not like become the next American Idol or Taylor Swift or whatever just... music. But I've thought the same stuff about other things like photography or psychology or all this other random cool stuff I could do. Though I think I feel more drawn to music. It's something I always daydreamed me doing and I always loved the magical feeling of being in a band or even just sitting back and listening to a song. So why hold back a desire like that, right?

The thing is, I've never taken a singing class and I know I could use some of that, and I gotta learn more than one instrument that I was kind of bad at in the first place. But I've settled on things a lot in life because I never felt like I was good enough for this and that. I don't want to make myself unhappy my settling down on something again. I mean, I can take classes and learn another instrument, right? Better late than never?

I'm feeling uneasy the more I keep thinking about it, though. I think I'm just nervous cuz I'm going to college soon. I have a loose plan. For now I'm going to a community college to get my basic course they make you do done and over with, as well as just EXPLORE other options. Music included. Then, if I make up my mind, maybe I'll go to a bigger college with at least some kind of idea in mind of what I could do in life (though this idea doesn't have to equal going to college). It's very loose stuff, just figuring out what I'm into and what I might like to do.

But now I'm overthinking and getting nervous about all these classes I've picked and I don't know why I'm SUDDENLY FREAKING OUT.

sdfkjhsj this doesn't even make sense anymore, I don't know what I'm trying to say.

I'm just really nervous and overwhelmed right now. Trying to organize my thoughts and figure out what I have to do.

That is all.

/does a little jig

Greer already slapped these up at capeandcowl but I wanted to slap them up here too for the sake of slapping.

dsfhsahsdf

I had my first REALLY FREAKY dream in a while.

My dreams are usually pretty weird in generally, stuff I don't normally like to talk about because it's pretty OUT THERE, but this one was just a combination of weird and terrifying.

So I was in this... video game for some reason. I was literally in the game, one of the characters. No game in particular, it was just... a game. I was partly aware it was a game, but... it's hard to explain. ANYWAY, me and my little RPG team had just vanquished this pretty fugly looking demon thing in a desert we'd been travelling down for a while. He dropped random crap like most enemies do when you defeat them, and we got this little empty engraved stone box. I was the designated carrier of the box since hammerspace didn't exist (!!!), and we walked down the desert until we found a base.

Said base was full of women and children, but they provided us some shelter for the moment--THEN SUDDENLY MONSTERS. THE FREAKIEST GOD DAMN MONSTERS I'D EVER SEEN IN MY TINY LITTLE GAME LIFE.

They were, like, human people, only with their eyes gouged out and bleeding all over the place. EXCEPT THEY DIDN'T HAVE LEGS THEY HAD HUGE ROBOT SPIDER THINGS. THIS WAS ACTUALLY SCARIER THAN I CAN DESCRIBE IT. As for the weird ~RANDOM~ elements that come into my dreams, Miku Hatsune was in it. Only she was more realistic looking compared to her cute little cartoony look AND SHE WAS ONE OF THE BLEEDING (for some reason) SPIDER MONSTERS GORING EVERYONE TO DEATH SO I WASN'T REALLY WEIRDED OUT BY THIS JUST TERRIFIED.

And for some reason I was aware my sister was in the base. ... I don't even know, I just suddenly knew this. So I was freaked out as hell trying to look for her but then the FUGLY DEMON COMES BACK TO LIFE ONLY LIKE A MILLION TIMES FREAKIER AND HE'S LIKE "BLARGGGH" AND EVERYTHING TURNS ALL... HELL-ISH. Like, sky gets red, ground is cracking, etc. So while all this hell-stuff is going on around me I remember that the stone box was supposed to help vanquish this BS. So I run to get it, but... I forget what I'm supposed to do with them.

Then I'm like "CRAP I NEED A STRATEGY GUIDE."

Then I woke up.

This is actually freakier than I can describe it.

Somebody hold me, bleeding robot spider Miku is gonna tear out my intestines.

I bought Mass Effect the other day and started playing today.

... Does that game give anyone else a headache at first, or is it just me? I'm trying to get used to it but it's one of those I-can-only-take-so-much-of-it-at-once kinda things.

Also, CONFIRMED. Nolan North IS playing Salem in Army of Two: The 40th Day. Sigh. Don't get me wrong, I love me some Nolan North. But he's not all that fitting for the guy. Then again, he seems kinda different in general... but I shouldn't just by the one TEENY little thing I saw. That and it could just be his voice too.

STILL WEIRD.
 

Newflash: Shannon and I come up with inside jokes, memes, or inside memes a lot.

The Latest One:

"Maybe the ___.

Maybe it's made of chocolate."

 

I am a loser, but I always wanted to RP this guy.

OKAY, NEVERMIND ABOUT MY BAD COMPANY 2 PREORDER BEING TOTALLY MESSED UP.

Since I preordered that game when dinosaurs ruled the land, I forgot if I had preordered at Gamestop or what. Turns out I did. So I got an e-mail today about my preorder being upgraded.



MADE MY GODDAMN DAY

So, like said, I'll be getting all the limited edition extra goodies since I preordered, as well as MY FREAKIN' BETA KEY SO I CAN PLAY THE DEMO NOVEMBER 17.

I'M AWESOME.

But in other Bad Company news, I might be deleting b_company. Not because of what everyone's probably thinking, I've just gotten so lazy with updates and don't wanna do it anymore. Running a community like that's just not my thing, I guess. I prefer posting my Bad Company shenanigans and dorking about this update or that compared to neutrally posting this information or that update or whatever anyway.

I was re-playing inFAMOUS today and when I got to the Sasha bossfight I thought to myself:

Oh, it must be rape 'o clock.

I'm awesome.

Met hot guy tonight.

And yet again I hadn't really bothered "prettying up" today. So I was in my dorky glasses, my hair was messy, in my lazy baggy clothes, etc.

DANGIT HOT GROCERY BAGGER GUY AND NOW HOT YOUTH GROUP GUY.